so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
