found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
You should frame my arrest warrant.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
we're so committed to being not committed
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