Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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