i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
