We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Randomize
