scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
