I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
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