Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Randomize
