Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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