threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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