His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Randomize
