No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
cat food counts as protein by the way
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
When are your genitals available?
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
