O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
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she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
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The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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