Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Randomize
