Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
