question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Randomize
