doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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