come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
