Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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