the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
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