I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
