the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
