two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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