i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Randomize