I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I'm determined to sit on that face.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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