I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
