Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
two words...techno handjob
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Randomize
