is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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