Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Randomize
