i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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