you traded sex for a burrito?
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
