we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
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Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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