Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Randomize
