there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
