why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize