never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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