are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
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