11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
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