It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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