You're so nebulous sometimes
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
i believe in u and ur pee
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
