why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
