Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
