So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
