the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Randomize
