Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on