So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
