I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Randomize
