Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
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