Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Damn victory sex feels great
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
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