I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
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