He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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